Written December 4, 2021

The past few years have been tough, Chronic Pain, Severe Depression, Severe Abdominal pain no one could figure out, lack of insurance, broke my foot, etc. I was in bed most of the time and if I did go out I had to plan medication, fluids, what I ate, and bring an emergency bag for all the other stuff.

The beginning of 2020 I was finally awarded Disability after years of trying. That helped so much, it allowed me to see doctors and look for help. Then after the Quarantine, our lives didn’t change much. We only went out for doctor appointments and El’s events.

In September all three of us got Covid. El had a little cough, JC’s was like a bad case of the flu, and then there is me. Nothing is ever easy with me, ever. After several doctor’s appointments and a few ED visits, I was intubated and flown from West Plaines to Cox in Springfield.

I remember a few snippets over then next several days while I was intubated, waking up and trying to pull the tubes out. I remember several people rushing to my bed and holding down my hands while someone put me back under. I remember a nurse being so sweet tell me they don’t want to hold my hands down but they have to keep me safe. She was so comforting.

Then I remember a nurse asking me my name, DOB, if I know where I am, stuff like that. I remember she asked who was President. I asked if the elections had happened yet, I had no sense of how long I had been there. She said the same President when I came to the hospital. I rolled my eyes and made a face as I said his name, lol. 😁

When I started to come around they had me sitting up. So many nurses, techs, therapists, and doctors told me I was a miracle. A Speech Therapist told me I was the first patient leaving the unit awake in weeks. One nurse asked me how it felt to be sitting up talking when they didn’t think I would wake up at all. Seriously! I had been so sick I had personal nurses watching me round the clock. I had been on life support for 9 days. From what I could find out from medical records I was on full life support for the first few days and on the Ventilator for the full 9 days.

I went from the Critical Care Covid Unit to another part of the “Gym” where the nurse had a few patients. The large unit looked like a gym. After a few days I went to a semi private room where it was easier to rest. I was there several days as they tried to help my strength and movement. Then I was transported to West Plains to help me transition home. I was in the hospital for almost a month. I was so weak I couldn’t walk but a few steps. Wow! When I think about how far I have come it is truly something that could only be done by God.

All the medical professionals I have seen recently are floored at how well I am doing considering how bad I was. I sorta win the award for Worst Illness but Still Alive! There really should be a metal or trophy or something 😎.

I had seen a lot of doctors, nurses, and therapists . We were so blessed to have Dr. Eisenbuis and his team in St. Louis. I had two surgeries so far to remove scar tissue from my Larynx and removal of part of my Vocal Cords. That is another miracle, I had a large portion of my Vocal Cords removed yet I can talk! There is no explaination of this, I should have at best a rough, scratchy voice. But most days I can scream at El. Aren’t I the best Mom, lol. She was so excited when I first yelled, lol she said “Mom you are yelling! You can yell!”

I still have Chronic Pain and a hereditary disorder that will always take a toll on my body. I will still encounter problems with doctors, treatment, and insurance. I will need to stay on top of my Severe Depression and Anxiety. But I can look back on this year and know God brought me through so much, saved my life! It seems because of the pain the healing is so much sweeter.